Monsters (losing morality)
They are always there
Even when i can't see them
I can sense them.
Creeping around the outskirts of my conscience
Venom seeping from their lips
Poisoning my brain
Their clawed hands reaching for my throat
Choking my enthusiasm
Ripping into my heart.
The blood in my veins has become toxic
Contaminated by the mere existence of these monsters
That live inside of me.
The devil on my shoulder keeps whispering in my ear
Depreciating every inch of me
Manipulating my brain
Till i can't tell right from wrong.
My shadow has become my only friend
A ghostly extension of myself
The one thing that never leaves my side
Following doutifully behind me.
I fail to recognize the person i see when i look in the mirror
They never seem to match the image in my mind
How foraign a thought that i am them
A pair of vacant eyes
That lead into a maze of confusion.
My soul has been darkened by blood and madness
A stain that cannot be erased
A scar that cuts deep into me.
My mouth, an empty cave
The soft skin lining it torn by jagged words
A fleshy, raw stump that used to be a toung
I bit down on it too many times.
My body does not belong to me
Yet i’v scattered my thoughts about as if it does
Cluttering it with my morality
But i never dare touch the far corners
The parts of me that have been left to collect dust
The closed doors hiding unimaginable horrors behind them
I only explore the space i’v been granted
I leave the rest to the shadows that dwell in the darkness
Never coming into the light
Possessing me when i'm most vulnerable
This body is a shared acomadation
My sanity, or lack thereof, is not my own.
I’ve developed a great fear for the unknown
You neve know what demons await you
When you turn the corner onto unexplored territory
When your integrity takes its leave
And you are left iniquitous
Not caring what consequences your actions bring upon yourself
Or anyone else for that matter.
I’ve been drained of every ounce of ethicality i once held
My soul has been acquired for darker means
All light has been sucked out of me.
I have lost all ability to feel empathy
Any emotion is forced and filtered
So to block the guilt caused by my crimes
I shut off my feelings, and hope to die.