fight the fear schloarship
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the poison of your words has done nothing but strengthen
my stomach, the muscles taut beneath the skin.
the powder on my tongue from the pills
worth the retching and trembling bones,
Nervous as a bitch
Palms are sweaty and hot and cold chills.
Standing there faceless with
Mommy. I’m sorry I’m not more like my sister.
I failed my math test today.
Mommy. I’m sorry I’m not more like my brother.
I didn’t win a medal today.
Mommy. I’m sorry I don’t always make you happy.
Walking,
Climbing,
Attaching myself to the rope.
Friends hold my hand,
they see my fear.
They push me forward.
One step,
Two.
Don't look down.
Easy.
I fear my life
It is scary and impatient
With amazing opportunities
And deep personalities
It frightens; I feel frightened
I fear my life
It is scary and impatient
With amazing opportunities
And deep personalities
It frightens; I feel frightened
the first time i heard about you it was like a dream
your name sounded so good leaving my mouth
"college"
but despite everyone saying that you love me
you despise me
a first generation chicana female