a letter to my dad
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The dust flies up in piles, unwanted.
Coating my eyes in a layer of grit, of oblivion.
The grass is freshly cut,
just like at home.
Home.
I never knew
The man who always tied my shoes,
The man that would sing me to sleep
To the tune of the victory march of his favorite team,
The man who took me to my first Irish game,
Dear Dad,
Where were you?When mom was working 24/7 to put food on the table.
Where were you?
When your own flesh and blood came into the world unstable.
Where were you?
dear dad,
you look at me
when i am a woman,
pretty pink dress
clung like a leech
sucking content
from my skin.
Dear Dad,
There's a hole in my heart, where you should've been.
A man not a coward; that's what I wish that you could've been.
I used to pray and ask God, "Do he think of me?"
Dear dad,
Hey remember me?
It’s me, your princess
It’s been a decade since we last saw each other
How’s it like in Heaven?
You had a hard life
But you kept fighting
Locked up
Gone for months,
See me once
Still don't make an effort
Moved away
But you stay
Still don't make an effort
Right upstairs
But who cares
Still don't make an effort
You slithered in one night
when I was four
I watched You creep inside
and shut the door
I remember the weight -
your hips on mine
I tried to run, or yell,
or even hide.
Dear Jeffrey Mark Spencer
I thought I could forget you
The empty parking lot at Irvings and missed phone calls long forgotten
It even became a joke to us
Somewhere in the World Rd.
Emotions Point
Gone, Outer space
December 13, 2017
Dear dad,
I mean person,
I’m sorry… man?
Dear Dad,
You bought me breakfast
Again.
I should be grateful.
You worked for that
Money.
But I’m
Not.
Dear Daddy,
Did you know I loved you?
Did you know you were my favorite?
Did you know I'd miss you?
You didn't have to do it, daddy. You could've waited one more day, one more
hour.
When we were first born, my dad was terrified of us.
We were the two scariest people that he had ever met.
