Trust Issues
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I told you all the things
I showed you my poems
You knew who some where about
You showed him
You broke my trust
I'm not sure what to do
You broke my trust
Who are you
You broke my trust
One day I might trust
One day I might find the one
One day my mom might be okay
One day my sister may find who she really is
One day my brother might learn to truly care
One day we might all be a happy family
I Don’t Believe You
I’m Sorry
(I don’t believe you)
Seriously I Am
(I don’t believe you)
Here
Here's a book
Read it
Look
Look at those words
Believe it
Live
Live by that book
Love it
All your problems will melt away
All you got to do is read that book
Keeping everyone at arm's length
so nobody ever gets too close.
I can't deal with anyone hurting me again.
Or leaving. Or being mad at me.
I'm empty and afraid
and I'm sorry I can't fix myself.
Keep searching for the lyrics of a broken heart
But no words can really express the pain that I feel
No one will ever understand the life I have lived
So I am left here to write this myself.
I would rather drown in makeup and my own tears before you called me ugly again.
I would rather face my own fears before you made new ones in my head again.
I would rather sleep alone before you laid cold in my bed again.
Why won’t I get it?
I have friends both male and female.
I go to parties.
I’m social with others.
I do all these things and yet
Whenever I hear my loved one does it as well
My brain tells me
You smile at me,
When there's no one better to smile at.
You sit with me,
when there's only one empty seat.
You laugh with me,
when there are no other jokes.
how stupid am i to believe
EVEN FOR A SECOND
that I could possibly
NOT TRUST
my sister
my own sister
I'M SORRY
(June 5, 2010)
Oops.
I am not in love with you,
But I have written too many poems
With your names in all of the blank spaces
To ignore this feeling.
