I am a colourful darkness
never seen through closed doors,
only the window of a heart.
A heart that's been neglected,
that is all set to burst.
To burst into the outside world, unknown.
Into the whirlwind, the madness, life's pure vulnerability.
I am ready.
Ready to grow, learn, and appreciate what is unseen
within the ordinary calm.
Calm, I am not.
Nor was I ever, always anxious to prevail.
Prevail I will!
As I now know who I am, a changed person,
Just looking for the right turn.
Turn back the clock, five years past,
Blissfully ignorant, drowning.
Drowning in knowledge, right and wrongs.
I was adrift, struggling under grey waters.
Waters which held me captive for days,
nowhere to be found.
Spending months searching for a home.
"Home is where the heart is",
But not my heart.
My heart is a colourful darkness,
The only darkness I have ever known.