To the person that I learned to forgive

Dear you,

You.

You were the one who first introduced me to the bitter taste of coffee

Showed me how to drink just enough to remember your sea green eyes in the moonlight

I still remember the nights we stayed up until four in the morning because we were both insomniacs with a love for the night

That's when everyone and everything is most vulnerable isn't it?

But of course, you know that

You knew, even then, that you were intoxicating

I could, and did get drunk off your endless words, your empty promises

Before you all I had known were the leaving and the betrayals

I had hoped you were different

And you were

Like me,

except, not like me at all

Stronger

Better

You did not need me to keep you afloat

But I needed you, like a drowning victim in the currents of a storm

Gasping

Desperate

Reaching

So I held I for dear life, hoping you would let me stay afloat in the waves of an ocean so immense

it could have been my whole universe

Instead

You pushed me off

Maybe you knew that it was all for the best

That I would become stronger because of it

Learn to love myself enough to save myself

Maybe you didn't

But either way

Thank you

Not for showing me the way

But for pushing me off the wrong one