Where Is Home?

Sun, 04/27/2014 - 02:57 -- MLY

They tell you not to make your home in a person

That’s too risky.

When they leave, you’ll be left empty, homeless,

Sad, lonely.

But if you don’t make your home in a person, then where do you?

Do you make your home in your dormroom?

Your first apartment?

Your first house?

A house cannot hold you while you cry

An apartment cannot laugh at your lame jokes

Your dormroom cannot hold your hair back while you puke at 3 AM

So I’m asking this:

Was it a mistake to make my home in the eighteen year old boy who broke my heart my senior year?

Was it a mistake to make my home in my big brother who moved out and was the cause

For my week long crying?

Was it a mistake to make my home in my best friend, just to have us drift apart?

Where these all mistakes?

They all caused me tears

They all made my heart hurt

They all caused me pain I never thought I’d recover from.

But then I did, and I moved on.

Maybe it’s just me

Maybe I’m a nomad of sorts

Moving from one home to the next

Because I choose to make my home in people.

Does that make me stupid?

Is that not safe?

I suppose I’m just reckless then,

I suppose I’ll never learn

Because one thing I do know, is that I will continue to make my home in people

Until the day where I either get it right at last,

Or I can finally learn to make my home within myself.


Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741