When Did I Grow Up?

Wed, 04/10/2019 - 15:49 -- EmSand

When Did I Grow Up


You say, “I can’t believe how much you’ve grown up!”  “When did you get so big?”

“Are you going to college?”  “What major are you interested in?”  

“I remember when you were 3, when did you get so…...old?”

I’m 17 not 71 and yes, I’ve grown, no surprise. Time flies!

We all change.  Life isn’t the same for me either.  

Lemme ask you….

When did I go from “a mess” to “learn to be responsible”?

“Sassy” to “Be Respectful”? “Sleepy” to “Lazy”? “Have Fun” to “Someone might have a gun”

“There is no such thing as monsters under the bed”

to “Be Careful! Stay Aware!  Think! Use your head!

Bad things happen to good people.”

Don’t be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Is there a right time for a wrong place?  

See, yesterday, I was playing dress up, saving my prince and slaying dragons.  

Today, I dress down, sweats and tees, pray that people don’t notice me.

Cover my shoulders, back, breast, stomach, and legs because

I can’t distract the prince.

And slaying dragons, well, that just makes me a bitch.

Gone are the days I worried about cartoons, colors, and snacks.  Now I worry about

Grades, Assessments, Life Goals, Fitting in, Being cool but not too cool.  Don’t want to look conceited. Do they like me? Why don’t they like me? Do I like me?   

Am I good enough?  Am I enough?

Make the right choices, Don’t fail, Don’t ruin your life, Don’t Flush it all down the drain

Just play the game.  

Follow the rules. Just like being a kid.    

Except now, rules aren’t shared

Until after you did what you did.

So, I guess that’s how I know

How grown up I’ve become

When I started learning from mistakes

And began planning for what’s to come.


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