10 Reasons: Part One
1. I hate my acne, how it blemishes my cheeks, leaving scars for you to trace in the dark as you kiss away my skin
2. I hate my weight. The rolls of fat unevenly proportioned around my middle so that my jeans will never fit "just right" and my broad shoulders remind me every time I pull on a shirt that I'm not built like a woman
3. I hate my appetite. My stomach's never satisfied with a salad or a soup. No, I need the whole damn steak.
4. I hate my laugh, how it crescendos through deep rolling hills starting in my belly and ending in my soul. It's infectious, because once I start you can't stop
5. I hate that I'm beautiful, because I know that I'm not, but damn, when you look at me like that I outshine the stars.
6. I hate my honesty, "No, I'm fine," why the hell can't I just say that, but no, I have to go bare my whole soul to you in hopes that you don't bare it right back
7. Man, I hate that I'm faithful. I hate that I'm never gonna throw in the towel when things get tough, and that every time you leave, I'll stay
8. I hate that I believe, believe all the lies that you feed me, hoping, maybe, by God's grace. It's different this time and you'll stay
9. I hate myself. I'm too good for you, and not good enough for you, and I'll never ever be what you need, but I keep trying and changing to become bad enough for you, and good enough for you, and to somehow attempt to be what you need. I hate myself because I have lost myself. But
10. Mostly, I just hate that I give a damn. I hate that I care about myself, my weight, my height, my face, my attitude I hate that I'm not happy being me.
10 Reasns: Part Two
1.I love my scars, they tell stories of survival, give life to my soul, remind me I am here for a reason, they tell me everything other people let me forget
2.I love my curves, each mountain and valley residing on my sides take pains to protrude and remind me I am soft, delicate, I deserve to be handled with care, I am a woman. 3.I love my taste buds. So what if a steak has three million more calories than skinny girl’s bite of lettuce. I am going to eat it anyways and I will be proud, and yes, I will moan, because why, my self worth is not contingent on my jean size
4. I love my laugh. There’s something liberating about your belly shaking until it hurts, your body exploding with joy, giving another human being pleasure with just the touch of your voice.
5. I love that I’m beautiful, something you can’t touch, my glamour goes beyond my blemished skin. I am more than the curves surrounding my center, I am sexy; I am brave; I am smart. I am fearless wrapped up into 5 feet of glee. You. Cannot. Touch. Me,
6. I love that I’m honest. There’s something refreshing in saying, back off, you weren’t good for me anyways
7. I love that I’m faithful. Faithful to myself, my dreams, my ambitions. I am more than a man’s lover, I will live my life worthy to the calling I have received, regardless of what price you have placed on me
8. I love that I believe, trust in first loves, don’t doubt passion; it was sincere in the moment, but as that moment collapsed, outstayed its welcome, I believed I was more, and I will be ok, and one day, ten years down the line, that same moment will come tapping on my door, requesting to visit an old friend
9. I guess in all I love myself, each and every blemish and bruise, every scar I’ve been given. I was not created for your pleasure, but for His glory, I only require myself to wear that badge proudly
10. I love that I am who I am. loud, flamboyant, I am not afraid to speak my mind, which is why, I’m standing here, calling you to action. Take a chance: love yourself.