knuckles are bleeding again 

hit the wall too hard

cover the ragged flesh with paint. 

makeup's smeared again 

mascara streaks down cheeks

turn the smudges into tiger stripes.  

scratched and bruised again

ran through the thorn bushes

still trying to find a way out 

and didn't care

turn the scars into constellations.

all of these wounds the world makes  

become the flowers and butterflies

of my sunny day pictures.

there is pain in my paint   

and my heart is bleeding 

out in the serenity of rolling hills

and golden sunsets.  

take what hurts and make it beautiful

an exquisite lie that culminates in

I'm Fine.  

so when you ask me what the 

girl melting into shimmering light

or the evening sky full of shining lanterns mean

I can only ask you what you see

because they are the content of my soul

my lifeblood, my inner self

dripping out onto the paper 

from the wounds I try to cover.  

I am leaking sunshine and

I can only ask you to look at it

and take some of the spilled light

find some joy in it

 use it to uplift yourself

and change the world. 

because it's killing me.