soulless

How dare you look at me?

Look at me, like I can’t be me unless me is in the eyes of how you want me to be.

How dare you laugh at me?

Laugh at me; like I’m a joke, you revoke your respect, your intellect of my image has concluded to be stupid.

How dare you judge me?

Judge my appearance, my clearance of the world, my opinion, my out look of this life,

My life.

How dare you shut me out?

Out, 3 strikes with no warning

No chances

Just glances, stares and glares

Chairs thrown at my glass exterior to fuck with my unfamiliar interior mind,

Mind and body,

Body put to sleep

But my soul is sleepless

But I prayed, I prayed my soul to sleep

“Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the lord my soul to keep…”

Soul keeper

Keeper of souls

Souls that hold the gold sold to the dealer of life

Dealers, stealers, deal stealers

Dealer stealers of happiness

My happiness expresses my opinions.

My opinions are expressed through my chest out loud

On a cloud. I’m high, or I hope I’m high

Or hope to have high hopes,

Hopes and dreams that stream though my vains that lead to my heart that keeps my heart beating,

Bleeding blue blood to prove I’m cold blooded, like a shark in the water of hatred, I swim

I swam; I’m swimming far away from you and everyone else in this world.

My world is all I need to plant my seed and feed my greed of destruction.

No pain,

Painless,

Heartless,

So I complain less about myself, and myself told myself to love thyself, respect not neglect thyself,

But my mind said “go fuck yourself”

That I’m not welcomed here, that’s clear

I’ll steer in a different direction

Left? Right?

Doesn’t matter, I’ll crash, burn speed  up to hit a car unaware of the stare of darkness in my eyes, fire in my vains, the pain deep in my skin corrupting my mind and soul

Soul mind

Soul has a mind

A mind within a mind with a soulless soul.

A soulless soul of a mind within my mind hard to find myself, and I find myself like a CD, scratched and constantly skipping, and on repeat to the same bullshit

The same bullshit

The same bullshit

To your same bullshit

Fuck, I’m stuck on the same stoop, stoop kid.

Afraid to leave her stoop, afraid to leave something so familiar, But I can’t deal with the agonizing damage done, that can’t be undone. 

But I’m done, I’m done with this war against myself cause myself told myself to stop hating thyself and tell my mind of doubts, mind of lowness to fuck itself.

So fuck off, you and all your followers who followed you when you followed me to break me, to beat me

But your followers are weak, so to speak, I speak Greek to the English bullshit you tried to teach me.

I’m aware of the beware sign for the dog you are.

I’m prepared to stare into your heartless body and understand you’re nothing,

You’re useless

No stress for me, cause me, me, myself and I, We are free

Free from judgment and ugly glances,

I’ll take my chances of being different rather than being the same as everyone else.

Cause I told myself that myself should express itself and bless itself with a different self then everyone else….

So myself told myself …fuck everyone else  

Comments

Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741