Sorry

I didn’t mean to impose

On your feelings

Your space

Your thoughts

I could be better if I chose

I’ll just be quiet

Smile harder than the turmoil inside

Then wonder why at the dead of night I’m screaming at the sky

Asking who I am

What I’m doing here

And why my head and my heart are so filled with fear

I don’t know what I want

Or like

Or think

It’s more comfortable to not have opinions,

So I don’t offend

And don’t need to make amends

Forgive me

I’m not the way I think you want me to be

I’ll just lose myself in your words

And keep my heart off my sleeve

There’s really nothing worse than failing to please

Especially when it’s you,

Because I love you more than I love me

Let me surrender to this world that you create

So I don’t lose my grip on this reality

I’m on my knees begging you to let me blow you

Please

I’m sorry that I don’t look like the girls on the magazines

Let me just make you happy

I’ll be anything you want me to be

It’s fine that you don’t love me unconditionally

People really only feel like that in the movies

Just look at me

I write words that you will never see

I sit in my car outside the room where we sleep

For hours

I can’t breathe

 

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