sometimes i can't


sometimes i am not asleep

i just can’t get out of bed

i lay there motionlessly and pretend that i cant hear you come in

feign deadness to the sound of everyone in and out and in and out

slamming the door

stomping around.

i’m not proud…

sometimes i lie here for hours.

sometimes i lie here for days.

motionless. careful to breathe evenly.




not that deeply

how do we even sound when we are asleep?

hopefully no one can tell the difference.

i know i know.

more exercise.

i know i know.

direct sunlight

shower more often

wear nicer clothes

go somewhere

smile until i feel happy

everyone gets sad sometimes.


Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741