A passing smile fades inward to my strung out soul
I cringe at the smile with a friendly nod
Continue walking when I’d like to run.
because you never know who is following you or what secrets they will find.
Can they see?
Are they looking at me?
They are behind me
Behind is the past, which is a disaster
So I run
Passing smiles letting them fade
Knowing I must keep up this mascerade
I am Cinderella at the ball
But my prince has passed me up
So now I wallow in the embers of the fire
Because the world around me doesn’t stop
Just because I want it to
Smiles, smiles, I am sick of smiles
Let the tears fall, the hatred lie out on the hard faces
I cannot trust a single soul
As long as I shall live.
I run a thousand miles and back.
Running away, running to
It’s all the same.
I’ve lost track of what I am running from.
Trust is something you’ve got to earn
But how am I to trust when I don’t know who the devil is.
Your face shows a smile
Your heart shows a tear.
And I am wound up again on a pole
Deciding what to believe and what to portray
Because the face I wear, I wore the day before
It’s all a trick that keeps my feet moving, my head spinning
The ground rumbles and my feet fumble forward
I glimpse behind
The door to the past creaks
I hear a knock and I cry
Scared for my life, for the life of those around me.
Now I remember…
I ran because of the fear.
The fear drives me.
It keeps me going,
Not allowing me
To stand still for a moment.
I can’t catch my breath so I begin to power done.
And my body is set on fast forward,
But I can’t keep up.
So, I glitch
My face forming a smile
The same happy phrases coming from my mouth.
How are you?
I watch as life passes me by
And the instinct is still there
Run, it tells me
Look behind you, it tells me
But I can’t because I am stuck.
I have glitched.
I wish I could go back now and repair the wound
Stick up the pain
So that this never would of happened.
Because now I am frozen in time.
I cannot move, cannot see what lurks behind me.
My head will not turn.
So even if the devil himself was to be there
I could do nothing.
I am a doll on a pedestal smiling down
You smile up
And the entire time I am thinking