The Sit down

I had a dream about you, and it was me talking to me. Except, we couldn’t agree.

I said to myself “But was it worth the pain“, my retort was simple “How did it feel in your brain?”

Chemicals clearly fired, leading bliss to the cortex, I looked back and said “But sometimes it feels like a vortex.”

“You know, like she’s a whole galaxy, and the only thing that matters in my reality. So reality changes“

I smile at me and say “Isn’t that the strangest feeling? I know we’d die for her, but couldn’t you just try for her?

She’s finally happy without you in the picture.” “True but I miss her, and inside of my heart is a mixture.

There’s feelings of love mixed with regret.” “So what, life isn’t over yet. Don’t forget, you’re still breathing”

“Yeah and she’s still leaving, and I have to pretend that my heart isn’t bleeding.”

“Moving on is giving up. Never seeing her face again is like losing my eyesight for eternity.”

“So what, you don’t yearn to be, free, and walking tall? You don’t think you deserve that at all?”

“She wasn’t holding me back, I was holding US back. And later, was too late, to realize that mistake”

“So just take a step back, and turn the other shoulder. You ain’t gettin any younger, you’re only getting older.”

“And she’s only getting bolder. There’s so many things I should have told her, back when I used to hold her.”

“But you didn’t so, by gones be by gones.” “There’s no room in my heart, I need to construct additional pylons.”

“This is no time for game jokes, I know it’s a self defense thing. So now you’re losing to yourself in verbal fencing?”

“No you’re point just doesn’t stick, I could give her everything I’ve got if I had one more chance.”

“Yeah, but that’s a pipe dream man. You burned that bridge, and set fire to the landscape. Why don’t you j….”

“…Just stop trying to convince me I didn’t ruin the best thing, I could have ever been investing, in.

I could have had the best wife, with the best kids, in the best house, because it would have been ours.”

“Well that’s life, maybe you should use that as a lesson for”

“I might never take another class, this is something I can get “over” but it’s something I can never “get past”"

“You can sit in this room and ponder everything. But remember those bonds you ended up severing.”

As he walked out, he slammed the door, I put my head in my hands like so many times before.

“She was the pinnacle, the peak, her mannerisms when she speaks, I miss it all.”

I look up at the ceiling of the well lit room, I think “One more chance, it was over too soon”

But he had said that so many times before, before he realized his mistakes were absolute.

There was nothing left to do. He drank another Manhattan, and sent this off to you.

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