i hope i look pretty when i cry

because i do an awful lot

i hope my tears look like raindrops

the good ones on warm summer days

and the red eyes remind you of roses

and not sleepless nights

and that you don’t think its your fault

i don’t want it to be your fault

 

but it is your fault

i’ve been doing things that i said id never do

i've been digging trenches in the branches

of once loved trees

i’ve been lifting my head

for bottles

and lowering it

for loved ones

I’ve screwed my chances

my family

my friends

my happiness

I’ve been doing things i said i’d never do

 

but then again, you said you’d never leave me

 

its one of those days where

every sound

sounds like you

every smell

smells like you

every touch

feels like your arms

around me

and on me

and through me

and here come the rain and the roses

and the pink sea washes over me

and i drown in the loss

Its one of those days

where you can feel the emotions

of the people who left you

and you don’t want to feel anymore

 

so you lie down in linen

and get swallowed in sweatshirts

that no longer carry his scent in their seams

and the silent rain falls

 

but outside the sun shines

 

bright contrast

to blackened lips

and puffy eyes