I keep reminiscing about that night . That night where I risked everything for you . That night where I felt as if nobody else mattered except for you and me . Some might say this was a dumb experience to learn from and I guess in a way it was , but it also was an experience where I felt alive . Wanted . And even tho nothing happened that night you laying next to me was the thing I wanted the most . You made me feel happy . Like not the kind of happy that lasts for some seconds but happy in the way where I turned looking at you and you were already looking at me . The feeling of securing that intense love I felt for you was to me amazing. Even though this “love” or what to some was “lust” I felt towards you ended quick I can’t seem to find the right words or the right ways to move on and forget about you , trust me I’ve tried but it all comes back to the same night in my room. And I ask myself why ? and I think it’s because I haven’t gotten some type of closure from you. It’s because you left me with all those amazing feelings that now I don’t know how to throw them all away. It’s because I don’t understand why giving up on someone seems easier than to keep trying . I see you talking to new people but I wanna know was it all worth it ? Or do you simply not give a fuck ? Those are the questions I keep asking myself, because I can’t ask you . And I owe that to myself to have that respect of not caring where you are at or who you are with. I just hope you realize what you lost. Yeah you lost not me . You lost someone who would’ve gave you all the love you deserved and who would have you do crazy but amazing things to help you see the things you are capable of achieving. You lost someone who saw so much potential in you who didn’t care what other people said or thought about you , who would stick by your side even if you were wrong . The person who saw your flaws and still thought you were a beautiful person inside and out . The one who understood you the one who knew your favorite snacks and the weird foods you put together that somehow tasted great. The girl who truly really cared.