The Reason She Writes
Location
It is in that moment you know what you want
The moment you:
Flip a coin and hope it lands where you desire
Make a wish and blow out the candles on your cake
Those moments you don't realize what you want
It is only while it is happening you become aware
Every girl begins with a diary
It is a secret vault that harbors her every thought
She goes there because she feels safe
It is a place of freedom and expression
Something she prides herself in having
There she releases the thoughts she holds within
Eventually this girl finds herself conflicted
She has grown and so has the dilemmas in her life
Her crushes are accompanied with thoughts more serious
Thoughts that make or break someone
She looks outward hoping to find a soul to confide in
But she draws a blank because everyone left
At this moment in time she looks inward
Reflecting at the choices that brought her here
The reasons she feels the way she does
And she questions what she wants out of life
As her mind floods from all the emotion she feels
She sees the diary, now coated with dust, and she smiles
She recounts all the moments she spent analyzing
Writing down the mindless convictions that popped into her head
The boys she liked, the music she listened to, and even the fights she had
She remembered the feeling she would get after writing in her diary
This feeling of self awareness and gratification
Because she discovered herself when she wrote
So at a time when she was more lost than ever
She decided to try and find that elated feeling
The girl gathered some paper and a pencil and began to write
There was no plan of action or a destination she wished to arrive at
She just wrote and it was as easy as that
Those years away spilled onto the pages with no restriction
As the girl wrote it appeared as if she had never stopped
She had fallen into writing after years of abandonment
Her mind expanding with every word she wrote
And she found herself coming closer to a discovery
Leaving no thought untouched and getting closer to who she wanted to be
And who she wanted to be was a girl who writes in her diary
Not because she wishes to remain a child
She does this because it helps her
Writing aids her on the journey of her life
It helps her understand the things she goes through
It gives her clarity when she feels adrift
Writing becomes a gift that she values dearly
To her it’s a haven
When she writes she becomes engulfed by the sanctity of expression
The words simply rush out so naturally
And give her such a remarkable insight
Her writing consumes her fears and insecurities
Giving her a safe and surreal place to let go and unwind.