The Problematic Problems of Advanced Arithmetic

A girl, the ripe age of sixteen of course, only has one thing on her mind: young gentlemen. Marcie Lionis was no different than any other girl of the same age. She constantly talked about how she deeply longed for a boy to hold hands with and snog in her free time. Although she never actually knew what it was like to hold hands or snog, she assumed she would really enjoy it.


There was a boy in her advanced arithmetic class that she was particularly interested in, his name was Johnny Masterson. She always imagined herself walking on the beach with Johnny Masterson; him gripping her slender and dainty hands firmly enough for the tips of her fingers to turn white, due to the loss of blood flow.  They would walk until they reached the lighthouse at the end of the beach, and a nice picnic would be set up in the watchroom. They would listen to old jazz tunes, and dance. They would laugh until they could barely breathe, and their stomachs’ were aching. The liveliness of the evening would captivate them so greatly that they would begin to snog and caress each other until they both would decide to relieve themselves of their abstinence. They would be in love.


But sadly, Marcie never even tried to speak to Johnny. She never had the courage. Most days she would make it her mission to talk to him, but she always came up with a reason not to. “He looks rather immersed in his studies right now, today just isn’t a good day”, she would say to herself, “Oh, I’d better wait. I don’t know if he would fancy the blouse I’m wearing.” Johnny never paid much attention to the poor girl. He was an athlete, and a rather popular one at that. The girls loved his gorgeous brown eyes, and his dark black curly locks. Johnny had beautiful brains, and very becoming charm. He was a dream. Marcie realized that her chances with Johnny were slim, perhaps that’s why she never tried to speak to him. Marcie wasn’t an unattractive girl. She was short, slim, had a full head of dark brown curly hair, and dark eyes; her eyes were so dark, you could hardly locate the pupil. Marcie didn’t have a large posse of friends, and she didn’t speak unless spoken to.


On a day full of problematic problems of advanced arithmetic, Marcie noticed Johnny approaching her. As he walked over to her, she wondered if he had a question about the equations they were assigned, or if he wanted to borrow a pencil. Her heart raced, her stomach fluttered, the anticipation was devouring her insides. She had never felt so much excitement. Marcie was completely elated. As he got closer to her, he knocked over a chair. Marcie waited for him to pick it up. He didn’t. He simply just kept walking towards her. In that moment, Marcie’s heart sank down to her ankles; her stomach no longer fluttered.


“It’s Marcie, right?” Johnny asked her.

“Yes.” Marcie answered.

“Would you like to grab something to eat with me tonight? Maybe some pizza?” Johnny said with his charming smile, and smooth voice.

Marcie, with a stale face, picked up her books and walked out of the classroom.


She never looked back.



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