Poetry is Life

Sat, 10/27/2012 - 10:17 -- Grey

Poetry is life.
Sometimes my mind stops and I don't know what to write.
But in the long run poetry is a way to let go.
I set my dreams free and lets my feelings flow.
The whole world can know how I feel.
From a line and a word it's my sanity deal.
So I write so my voice can be heard.
I'm no longer just hidden from the world.

Comments

thisispoetryproject

Jessica,

You have SO MUCH potential in this poem! The feelings are very strong and I have no doubt what-so-ever that if you played with the words a little longer, this poem will be amazing in more ways than one can count. Every poet can relate to your words because poetry IS life!

Here's a couple things I would work on:

When you write, "I set my dreams free and lets my feelings flow" , you follow it by "The whole world can know how I feel" which somewhat breaks away the majestic feel that you began to create in the preceding line. Remember, every idea should evoke an image.

You have done an awesome job at evoking an image with the line "I set my dreams free and lets my feelings flow" for a couple reasons. Firstly, when you "set your dreams free" this implies that they were once jailed and, therefore, those 4 words tell a story in and of themselves. You followed that up with "letting your feelings flow" which, for most, will immediately construct the image of a stream, or running water in general. This allows for the reader to really "feel" what you mean upon explaining why "Poetry is Life".

You first say, "So I write so my voice can be heard" , which is definitely relatable, but then you follow it, once again, with a line that tells an incredible story: "I'm no longer just hidden from the world". However, your recent flow-- i.e. ending with flow and go-- is absent these two verses. Your poetic flow can only be developed by YOU and once you find it, I promise, your poetry will be taken to the next level!

All things equitable, your poem speaks to me as I'm sure it spoke to everyone who has read it! Continue your poetic journey and don't stop speaking from your heart! :)

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