you see I live in my mind

of course there is no escape

ever since I was 5 years old

I have been a victim of rape

but I put a smile on my face

to keep everyone else okay

not worrying about

all the stress so one day

I got home and I slept

when I woke up I cried

basically in my mind

I should’ve already died

my grandpas a rapist

my mom’s an addict

but somehow I survive

yet somehow I cut

through the branches of hell

and even though I didn’t want to

I fought my way through and

clawed my way to the top to

get to a better place and to

change the human race

and to make sure that whenever

this happens there is a place

for people like me to go

because there’s things you don’t understand

like how surviving isn’t living

not even close to the sand

living is peaceful and enjoying and nice

surviving is hell,

which I been through twice

and though I still find myself

in that hellhole called life

I figured out a way to pick myself up when I fell

And I relied on my friends and I relied on myself to pick me off the floor and put me back on the shelf

And I just tried to please people

And to my own demise

I thought if I don’t make em happy

they legit bout to die

So I made it my job

To be the therapist of my world

putting all the pressure on me

but I couldn’t see how

all the pain inside

was killing me

and one of these days

Ill place my blade to the side

and allow my scars to heal

and not make new ones

but until then,

peace,

I’m on my way to save my friends.