Pain and Push

I would not be me if I had a regular teenager life. The main idea for a teenager is to have good grades, a good family, a relationship, and some fancy car. I could calculate and say that only thirty percent on this earth have that. Others? They probably have at least two flaws. Maybe a D in math, or has to move around because they live in a foster home. Most teenagers dont have somethings they want to remember, but in the end, they have at least one memory that they have for the rest of their life before turning thirty. 

Writing about how I became the person I am today is something that is probably used with everyone else. But, mine is different, because it is in my eyes, my lips, my mind, my hands. The words are something that can be switched by others. But this one is mine. And my reason I am me today is: pain and push. Those two are the words that have been stuck on me for a very long time. I have a little saying with me, "When you get hurt, cry, and then smile, because now, you can only get stronger from there." I myself have been through many teenager things. Parents getting divorced, being forced to move in a little town I have never heard of, having my heart broken in two, and being yelled at by family. I can say many things that have hurt me, physically and mentally. But honestly, those main painful things I have experience have only helped me get to where I am today. If my parents never gotten divorced, I probably would have been a spoiled kid who gets whatever she wants, because i have a loving family who is there. But today is different. They made me see that love is something you don't always have, and at some point, I have to walk alone without someone holding my hand every second of the day.

Moving is also something that has been a great painful thing in my life. I could imgaine myself today still living in my home town, having great friends and living in the same apartment. But, I know in my heart, I would be bored of life, and have nothing to do but sit around. Ever since moving to a smaller town, I have found more stuff do to. Having people I barely new being my closest friends, learn new things about history of Santa Paula, and walking around a beautiful town that is my home. 

Attending a new school is something i can barely remember. I had too much fun with the students, that I forgot how to live correctly. Bullying was one thing that pushed me to not care what other people think about me. Being called wierd and awkward made me smile, because i wasnt one of those snotty girls with a swiggle in their walk. It made me one of a cool kids, who doesnt care if i wear unmatching socks, or if i have a boyfriend who is smaller than me. High school was even better. But yet it is even worse. Many more things happen. I did get bullying, I did get depression and more awkward to others. I got hurt the most there. My three years there were the most fun in the rollar coaster life. But now as a senior, it makes me look back at all of the tears I have shed. Because of it, it has made me taller and stronger now. The pain makes me walk the streets today. I can pass by things that make me unhappy, but now I can have the smile no one has ever seen before. And I am proud of being me today. 

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