Peace
That's what comes to mind when all of my worries and concerns about the other females drift into my thoughts
Peace
I no longer have to deal with sidelines or complications or triangles
Because I handled it myself
I was the one to step up, grow up, mature and demand what I want, what I need
I made myself clear by drawing a line that it was either them or me
I decided that I could not and would not take anymore of these foolish games
No more getting away with something that continued to push me closer to the edge of being insane
I put my foot down and it was heaven
Simply bliss because I had the opportunity to experience bliss
Not in him or us but in myself
I stood up for myself
I finally felt like a woman
Given at the time my heart was shattering and the floor seemed to disappear beneath me
And the air had blown out of my chest and my head felt like construction work was being done
Three days
This never ending pain just kept going on and on
But I was a fighter
I stayed tapped in the entire time
I was phenomenal
In that time I figured out yet another piece of who I was, who he was, and who I wanted to be
I knew for sure I wanted a man to look at me like I was the only girl in the world
I wanted a man to treat me like a queen
I wanted to be the best a man has ever had and in return be my best
Because the rest of the story would fall into play soon enough
I just wanted genuineness
I wanted love
I needed something real and honest
And that's what I got
Although it seemed as if I had given up on him
Kicked him out of my mind and heart
Completely erased him from my memory
But I didn't
I was secretly waiting to see his reactions, his response
I wanted him to be the man of my dreams even though he was the very one to shatter them
I wanted him to uplift me
Make me feel alive in the gray areas that was dead
He did all of what I wanted and so much more
I couldn't be anymore in love with him than now
He is my hope, my future, my everything
He is my best friend, my lover, my husband 
With him I know where we stand
With him, we stay in our own bubble
Just the way I like it
Its challenging, sweet, nerve racking, incredible, funny, sad, happy, engaging, angry, interesting, and wonderful
I love him 
No matter what happens or what is said
I love him
He has my heart
And he loves me with his
We struggle but we fight through the tears because we both know losing each other is our worst fear
No we are not perfect
Yes outsiders don't like him
Yes we have some bolts to tighten
But no, we will never give up
We are one of a kind, original
And what we may chose to do, its personal
So I don't think about haters when I think about him
I think of the smile he puts on my face
The way he says my name
How he holds me and kisses me
How we have come to be so close
Because he knows me from my head to my toes
And I admire that
He is all I could ask for
He is my
Everything