Nothing Less than Truth

Sat, 11/15/2014 - 16:06 -- ktsui

The truth is, I fear

 

(that no one understands:

why I threw away the keys,

why my heart is locked,

guarded by invisible insecurities,

that you need more than a knife,

to hack away thick thorns of judgment,

that a Mean Girl's stare leaves me emptier,

more full of cold doubt than ever before

 

that I am worthless:

an old vestige of my parent's pride,

a reminder of some gilded age,

now marked by blazing Fs that imprint

behind my eyelids so that even in Sleep,

wrapped by mellow, star-studded blankets,

swimming 'neath shallow childhood memories,

the monster lurks in the closet upstairs and

nothing is safe.

 

that I am insufficient:

overestimated so that behind jeweled hairclips,

stripped of cherry lips and puckered smiles,

there isn't a person under armor, just fear--

of losing the game I've gambled too much to play,

of free-falling while running,

'til my feet can't catch the ground

and I am lost again.)

 

nothing.

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