Normality

Dear God,

I'm screaming, I'm shaking, I'm dead inside.  I want to be good enough and believe me, I tried.

So I take a deep breath and I count to three.  I imagine the person that I wish I could be.

I want to be normal, I want to be kind.  I want to be that person only exists in my mind, but I can't face reality, I'm that blind.

Not blind in sight, but blind in the heart, blinded by oceans, blinded by the dark.

I walk around, it's pointless.  My body is numb.  I constantly wonder "God, are you ever gonna come?"

You're there when it's good, but it's not, You're not anymore. You leave with the key, locking the door,

Behind You, now I'm abandoned again with only myself to rely on.  God, please, can't You give me a shoulder to cry on?

I can't keep this up, I'm lost, God, I'm lost.  I know You sent Jesus and He paid the cost,

But God, I'm suffocating in the dark of my head and You know that I'm only hanging on by a thread. 

My heart is breaking, it leaves me shaking, what were You thinking when You were making,

Me?

 

This poem is about: 
Me

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