My Actual Real Feelings

I'm afraid I'm losing you

But lets be real, it's nothing new

It's not you

It's my selfishness

My nothingnes

My worthlessnes

I am an abomination

I shouldn't be alive

It's as if I'm about to dive

Into an abyss

For I can't remember the feeling of bliss

I only know how to be alone

I'm sorry that I never pick up my phone

I'm just a ghost

To those I love the most

And I'm so tired

I heard

You fell for someone new

And I'd never felt so blue

But life just fucking sucks without you

I don't want to be in this world 

Curled

Into a ball

I've seen it all

Thoughts picking me apart

Like critics to a piece of art

And I'm just a whisper in the breeze 

Then time will freeze

I'll fall to my knees

Because

My life fell apart

This poem is about: 
Me

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