Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

Small hands gripped the noose and they were mine
Tears fell, the ground sizzling as if I were already in hell.
This was it, this was my end
The worry ends here, the burden dies here.
Soon I would be a hollow shell of someone who once was but isn't anymore.
I felt the chair leaning, I heard it creaking, and I breathed a sigh of relief.
Before I decided to tip the chair completely, I caught a glimpse of the monster in the mirror.
Me, but not.
A demon with a noose.
A bloodshot face showing nothing but hatred.
What once was a broken smile feigning hope
A low-life who could never be loved.
I leaned a little farther.
If I leaned one more time, the chair would collapse.
I stared into the mirror to say goodbye
But as I looked, the demon subsided and the hope returned to my eye.
I could see beyond the monster, to me.
I saw the boy abandoned by his father
The boy who still has scars from Mom's failed replacements
The boy who couldn't go one day without being bullied.
It was then that I realized he was no monster.
He was never a monster.
He was a forgotten soul overcoming relentless obstacles, but never a monster.

A mirror is all it took to save me.
A simple reflection of someone I thought I'd never know again.
And now,
A mirror is all I need to bring me back.

This poem is about: 
Me
My family

Comments

Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741