#MeToo

I die ever time I see you

I see those eyes and they remind me of a time

A time when you told me what to do 

I did what I didn't want to

I see your eyes and it's the reminder of the fear I have inside of me building

The fear inside of me screaming to get out 

To get away from you and never let me see you again 

But I can't this is what happens thanks school and legal system 

Thank you for giving the assaulter more rights then the assaulted

I've had nightmares of you and I wake up and I'm in one

I can't escape it no matter how much I need too

It's like I have a pebble tied to my ankle and I'm slowly sinking into the water

Except as I get deeper the pebble grows bigger into a rock

Then into a boulder and before I know it I'm drowning 

I'm drowning in the mess you created for me and the mental illness that follows

I just want to die but I'm at the bottom of the ocean suffering

This is how you make me feel every day you are near me

Fifty feet away your a pebble ok I'm sinking but I can survive this

20 feet away you are a rock and it gets harder not to fear for my safety

5 feet away and your a boulder and I just want to die so I don't have to suffer and be suffocated in the water

Inches away and I stop breathing I go into complete panic for my well being I want to be rescued or to be dead 

How things are working there is no life boat just the ocean floor and sharks and I pray that they kill me before you lay one eye on me

This poem is about: 
Me

Comments

katyalater42

You put what i feel into words so beautifully.

This poem has so much emotion

Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741