To love you, is to love pain. This sweet undeniable pain. I cant deny you, like i cant deny a sweet ache in my chest. It burrows deep. You latch on to my soul. But I'm the one who is clinging to the edge for dear life. I'm waiting for you to save me but your the one sinking the ship. You create the rough waters that i must swim through. Yet i think of you as my life preserver. I'm blind when i see you, and weak when i touch you. The only way to save myself is to cut the rope and risk myself drowning. because with you i would surely drown. you would whisper sweet things into my ears as your poison absorbs into my blood and pumps through my heart and through out my body from my finger tips to my toes. I swim away through those rough waters. to save my life. i am getting my sight back i can see the shore. its dark and dim but i know it will become bright again. Im crawling at first its hard, im unsteady and scared with no leash to jerk me along. i must find my own way. Im finding things are different. im becoming strong. things are changing i see i can walk tall. and i can hold my head up. i am no longer looking to the ground. i look to my future. its freedom i see. The poison as left me and i am stronger now. you slither away frightened and misirable. I stand above you now no longer below you. You are smothered on your belly, under my feet. to love my self, is to be free. to love myself, saves me.