Life Behind the Pills

Attention Deficit Disorder

It ruined my life

Never will I say

It helped me find who I really am

I realized that

Every morning I wake up and

worry about how today will go

I don’t wake up to

find a smart and beautiful girl in the mirror

I wake up and

See a failure staring back at me like an unreplenished stream

When I look in the mirror, I no longer

See the same person I use to be

I still don’t

ADD is like listening to a radio station with a lot of static

The harder I try to understand, the more frustrated I get

As the teacher talks,

Ticking of clocks distract me

No longer does

My brain stay focused

The pills help

Nothing

My parents worry about

If I’m depressed now

Nobody asks

“Do you accept it?”

People ask

“Have you thought about suicide?”

I said no when the doctor asked

“Have you heard of ADD?”

The question that changed my life

I take the pills every morning

That’s why

I know what’s going on

And now

People tell me I’m doing better

They lie

People say ADD makes you a blank slate

I agree

The mind is a parachute, it doesn’t work unless it’s open

Mine never is

Life can be like a constant game of tug-of-war but

The pills help.

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