A Letter To My Virginity

A Letter To My Virginity,


We had a great run didn’t we? You were my best friend. At times my only friend and I always defended you because I was so afraid of losing you. You were not like my other friends. My other friends if we ever stopped being friends we could find our way back to each other again, but I knew with you and I, if I ever let you go for a second that you would be lost to me forever. I remember I held you close to me ever since you know who did you know what when I was sixteen and I was so proud to have fought for you. I shared you with no one, but as I grew older I became a bad friend. I was simultaneously proud of you and slightly ashamed that it felt like I was the only one who had you. Like you were my imaginary friend and I was a freaking 20 year old woman with a freaking imaginary friend. But you were not imaginary. You were real and I never realized how real you were until you were gone. Whisked away from me in the night and I let it happen. I said the magic words, “yes” and knew exactly what that meant for you. I knew exactly what that meant for us. And I’m sorry. I’m sorry you were the best friend I ever had the pleasure to know into my adulthood and that I let the world push its way into my mind. That I couldn’t accept the relationship that we had together and that although what we had was different from everyone else that it was okay. That no matter what anyone said that I knew why I wanted to keep you and it actually wasn’t fear. It was bravery, courage, and control. I had something that no one else could say they had before. I had something that no one could buy, sell, or rent. What I had was my own asset that did nothing but increase value with time. Since I was five years old I fought for you and fifteen years later I will continue to be strong. I just want you to know that wherever you are that I still love you dearly and I will always cherish the time that we had.


With all my love,


Milan Anaj-Clara Eatmon.

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