Just Keep Going
scrolling through
hundreds of pages
thousands of words
none are my own
full of lives I have never lived
never knowing how to compete
feeling small and insignificant
ONE HUNDRED PERCENT
ANYTHING LESS IS POINTLESS
ringing through my ears
pressure on my chest
can't eat
feeling small
feeling tired
after achieving nothing
YOU DON"T CARE
YOU'RE SELFISH
YOU'RE ENTITLED
YOU'RE A LAZY
AND A TRICKSTER
honesty is too much
the lies i give are not enough
the real me
runs and rebels
runs and rebels
not strong enough
never enough
do better
do more
I love you
I only want what's best for you
You have so much more potential
keep pushing
keep fighting
a day of fun
an hour of laughter
slip up
shit
gotta fix it
how to fix it
I'M SORRY
THAT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH
I DO EVERYTHING FOR YOU
THIS IS A GIANT FUCK YOU TO ME
FUCK ME?
FUCK ME?
NO FUCK YOU
I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO HAS THE RIGHT TO CRY
DON'T SQUEEZE YOUR FINGERS
DON'T LOOK AWAY
DON'T JUST STARE
how to react
what to do
just bear it
just push through
you know you have it good
you deserve the words
they are true
YOU DON'T DESERVE A SECOND CHANCE
WHAT'S THE POINT
YOU DON'T CARE ANYWAY
YOU THINK WE ARE STUPD
YOU THINK YOU CAN PLAY US
WE GIVE YOU EVERYTHING
all my fault
if i had just done better
if i had just pushed harder
i need to do more
i need her to know
i care
i want to do better
i want to be who you want me to be
another slip up
damn me
why can't i just do something right for once
it will be fine
just keep pushing try again
I GAVE UP EVERYTHING FOR YOU
WE ARE FIGHTING BECAUSE OF YOU
WE WOULD BE FINE
IF YOU COULD JUST GET IT RIGHT
YOU SEE I TOLD YOU SHE DOESN'T CARE
SHE IS PLAYING YOU
SHE IS JUST LIKE HER MOTHER
SHE'S USING YOU JUST LIKE HER MOTHER DID
it's apart of who i am
she is right
i must be selfish at heart
i break everything i touch
if i left it would get better
but i stay
because i can't be alone just yet
i can't do it yet
i'm not ready i'm sorrry
i'm not strong enough
Just give up on me. I'm tired of fighting and yelling. Stop caring. It will be so much better for you. I promise. Life will be so much easier. Stop holding on. Wash your hands of me. PLEASE! I'm begging you. for once, truely be done......entirely