It Isn't Funny And It Isn't Fair

I don't mean to be patronizing
Because you're an intelligent individual
And this proved it more than nearly anything else I've ever seen you make
And that is why I feel so bad that it didn't survive
Because it was beautiful
And I've never been this torn up over the fate of something fictional
I think partially because there are bits rooted in reality
Backstory things, just like Cabaret or HAIR or other things my heart breaks over
And if either of those had been killed early on it would've been tragic to me
But I wasn't alive then, and I'm alive now
So this is artistically tragic to me
I read online that you've been drinking more
It's just some odd anonymous source, not to be trusted, for all I know
But things like that scare me
Because I can only venture to guess how much that meant to you
And I don't even know what a fate like that for something beloved would do to me
Bad bad things, I know that much
And that, once again, is another reason why the demise of this fictional reality hurts me
It kept me from those bad bad things
But it couldn't be kept from those things itself
Art could be seen as inanimate, but I think there's more to it than just that
And I'm inexplicably angry for that reason
That something that obviously meant so much to you-
Which was something that came to mean an absolute ton to me-
Could be killed by the same people spoken of who only want to live in the past
Closed-minded to the possibilities of some bright beautiful future
I've had my character arc and I've gotten to the point now that I've surpassed some struggle
I have enough momentum, that as I keep going on, I shouldn't have to keep looking back
I still am stealing glances
And I have letters to write to people I must confide in, in order to tie up those loose ends
And one of those people is you
But my mind's all muddled up-
Especially given recent occurrences, that make the art I mourn for more poignant-
And obviously obviously yours likely is too
This is what I get for taking it upon myself to embed even more meaning into something that already makes me sad
But the things that make me saddest also inspire me the most, like Cabaret and HAIR, which I afore mentioned
I suppose that's the silver lining
Though that really isn't all that lovely for you
But I'll write that letter, and hopefully, my words will be meaningful enough to be a small glimmer of the silver lining for you
Because you deserve one- you really really really do

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