IS IT CRAZY FOR ME TO THINK..

IS it crazy for me to image myself different in the sight of what my past was.
 Or if I matter the Same in the eyes of friends when the door close shut and our true colors begin to expose. 
MAYBE how things that happen was for a reason or just another mistake I was to stupid to realize until It's to late.
 Is it crazy for me to protect the people who push me in front of a moving bus then after it hits me then  they decide to come along and help.
I become more stronger by myself then around lots of people. Is it embarrassing to cry in the dark and lie and say that I slept like a baby.
 That my anger speakers louder in silence then at a mic where everyone who is response can hear how they broke me in a million pieces.

That when the time comes I close the curtains and say sorry to those who couldn't understand me that maybe it was all  my fault. 


Hey are you listening to me can you feel me breath so quick as my heart pounds of the fear you had against me.


 That my imagination play a trick on me that I begin to invention thing that wasn't in reality but just in my head.


 Do you think I'm crazy to over think things that shouldn't be thought of. Or say something that only I could understand and get upset that you don't .


Uhh How did  I become  so difficult that a guy who figured me out I still remain unsolved .Is it crazy for me to write How I feel more then what I say because paper can't talk back or repeat anything that I lay on a lined piece of paper .

How delicate that paper may be until I throw everything I hold in so it all  can be relived off of me .HOW did I become this way that happiness is not what makes me feel complete , but that once I'm broken I appreciate all the things that didn't fall.


Is IT CRAZY to close up more then I open up and when I opened up push those who want to stay because I'm scared one day they will leave. I rush them at the fact because I know someday they will leave. 
IS it weird to be a hero in other people's eyes and a monster at the look of myself to laugh about it and say everything will be OK. To hide away from everything that tears me apart that I feel the need to show No weakness but strength. 


IS it crazy to have everything and somehow still feel emptiness inside. It's  like It's not enough to sustain me.
CRAZINESS that I speak maybe nobody will ever understand whats crazy about me but just confused and want answers. 


IS it crazy that what people say is the truth and what I have  been believe was a lie.... 

To afraid to have my problems Answers because they will See the craziness underneath .

 

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