February 5th 2009…6am

 Daddy? Daddy where are you? Dad?!

The house moaned and whimpers echoed throughout the walls.

Something doesn’t feel right...Why is everyone awake?

Where’s my dad? Something’s off...

Mom? Mom where’s daddy? Why are you crying mommy?

My stomach dropped 100ft when she spoke

Sweetie, daddy doesn’t live here anymore. The police came

They pounded and smashed through the thick white front entrance

Shoved the kids behind walls with the doors locked against them

Imprisoning them in a bedroom as they stood guard 
Posted on the other side of the creamy white walls
Arms crossed. Guns down. 
The rest ran through the house searching 
and trashing everything in their sight
I felt the hot flashlight rays through my eyes like a knife
as I lay in my bed wondering what this could all be about
Through mothers eyes I see 5 grown men in uniform

Asking where my father is

Mother insists he’s not home, and hopes they’re not real

They push her aside and force themselves through

Mother had no time to giving warning

Run! Run! She telepathically tried to signal

To her husband in distress

No use

The property was swarmed

Guards posted at every door. Cars parked on every street
they whizzed and they yelled until they found their dark prey
Then they pounced like wild lions and kicked against flesh as they took my father away

Threw him down hard on the floor with a gun to his head

Anchored him down with a steel toe boot to his back
Little bother, his son had been sleeping with his 4 year old arms wrapped around him
He held his skin tight as his little heart thumped
He slept and he snored with daddy on his side
And before he even knew it
Daddy was gone
The 5oh had come through like a tornado full of evil
They tore our family apart but I doubt they even cared

Dragged his body half naked across the floors to car, hands behind back

Clasped in handcuffs

Steel bracelets that meant his time here was up

Mother ran to find clothes to keep his body warm

Cops followed behind chanting words like a song

They’ve done this before. They enjoy this game

He’s not going to a party. Pick the clothes faster

They yelled

Mother runs to get money

He doesn’t need money where he’s headed

More stings from the cops
How was god supposed to know that marking his pigment down brown
Would make him a target
How was God supposed to know that dad being born outside the US would make him the enemy
And how were we supposed to know that the day we said goodnight would be the last time our eyes met his
Daddy had no record. He never killed anyone. He never robbed a liquor store. Daddy was a good guy.

So why is it that while I tossed and I turned wondering where my father was

The ones who made this happen could sleep happily at peace with their families

Under rooftops so giant

Sweetie, daddy’s on the phone

Dad? Where are you? Are you okay? Honey I’m going to be fine. Watch over your mother for me

You’ll be okay without me I love you. We’ll see each other again one day.

Tears erupted down my face burning a trail down my cheeks.

His voice carried an emotion I’d never heard before. Fear.

I’m going to be okay he repeated again and again. I’m going back home to Guatemala

But daddy you can’t go! This is your home!

And the line went dead. Along with my hopes. That was his only phone call.

In my dreams after that all my eyes saw

Was his body and face imprinted

A fugitive against law

His mug shot stood posted

In my mind for so long

Wanted posters hung loose

With daddies face

This is wrong

He was wanted by me but stolen by America

Those of us colored folk

We got it bad

Innocence is shattered because if you’re colored, you’re guilty

Daddy did nothing wrong, except not being born in the wrong country

10 plus years banishment? How is that even fair?

Daddy come back!

Daddy doesn’t have a choice

And we hope with hearts open and we pray with eyes closed

That deportation won’t strike another ones home

Why do our laws require us to scope out colors not white?

Daddy was a good man, Taken from home across nation

Put into jails across states, until he arrived back to his country

Isolated without hope to ever see his family again

Daddy I need you, when the stars don’t shine

Daddy I want you here, when mothers not home

Daddy where are you? When I feel so alone?

We’re under a different roof. But under the same moon

And for now I just pray

That one day I’ll know

A life when my father

Is legal for good



Guide that inspired this poem: 



Poem i wrote 5 years after my father was deported. 

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