I can educate

Wed, 07/04/2018 - 17:24 -- egats

I don't think I'm important

Which is why I become so angry

when I hear the girls in my class

typing more furiously after I make any

prompted comment of self-disclosure

then when the esteemed professor

is lecturing on course-relevant neuroscience material

I don't think I'm important

Which is why I become angry with

the boys and girls that got through school far enough

or were instructed to impose fear conditioning on me

Loudly cracking their knuckles as a Ugandan before a street fight

at certain cue words and behavioral patterns

such as any topic pertaining to love and romance

pop, pop, pop

on any occasion that I notice a beautiful woman is looking at me

pop, pop, pop

on any occasion that "right and wrong" is said

pop, pop, pop

on any occasion that I ask a question that makes me appear intelligent

pop, pop, pop

on any occasion that the topic of psycopathy or sociopathy is brought up

(I'm almost never the one to start)

pop, pop, pop CLAP

when I try to stand in line at a restaurant

CLAP! BOOM! pop, pop, pop

How salient does something have to be before I can ask for help without being stigmatized?

Is it a crime to be older, have an abusive and bitter ex-girlfriend that won't let go

To put down the girls that try to choke me to death, fatten me up, build me up 

just to throw me down again?

I don't hate the whole world

I hate that I was fated and pushed to where I am now

I'm not sure if it matters if I prove anybody wrong

Or if I prove myself right

Or if I show you those very sophisticated thermal cameras

that can penetrate through walls can be bought for a price

That many college students can afford

Or that basically all of the web traffic

on any home router system can be monitored

through a Network Administrator application

It's not my fault that I'm articulate from time to time

That I enjoy learning about science

And that I have had some moderate success

And that she still burns for reasons that I'm too kind to specify. 



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