For Her, Thank You

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“You must fake it to make it,” this is what you taught me

With a façade of a family, something no one else could see

 

To all others you were a great parent, at least that’s what they believed

But to me you were evil, forcing me to always concede

 

To give up friends you don’t like, but they were who I would require

To do the activities you wanted because that meant I would be what you aspired

 

On the outside you bragged about my good grades and many activities

On the inside you screamed of the bitch I am and my stupidity

 

It is the screaming and bitterness that makes you remain alone

Every man only leaves you, knowing you’ll never provide a happy home.

 

What kind of monster calls their 15-year-old daughter a whore?

Or lets their mother hold her down, so she could get more hits in than before?

 

Tells their daughter to leave every day of her life,

But when she tries to go, bombards her with words like knives?

 

You let me know that because you had me you are miserable

That I stole your youth, disappoint you, and make your life dismal

 

I only had you, you knew that, no sign of my dad

All I wanted was a parent that truly loved me, something I never had

 

And at 17 I moved out because I couldn’t take any more battery

Little did I know, that was just an invitation for you to take all you had given away from me

 

At 18 I came to you, once I had nothing

Not asking for any help, but something even more aggravating

 

I told you to keep everything, I just want your love and acceptance

With tears in my eyes, I begged, please mom, yet you showed no penance

 

Now I just want to thank you, for all you taught me

Of the miserable, soulless, bitter, mean person that I have the potential to be

 

You hate me because I’m different from what you wanted me to be

But everything I am, I am because I want to be FREE!

 

And yes I work full time, struggling to get by, walking to and from everywhere

Yet it is all worth it, because where you are at, I will never be there

 

I do not want to be fake and I will not turn away from fun!

I refrain from yelling and go about my life, not trying to hurt anyone

 

I was bullied so much at school, then I came home to you

All the words you and they said, is something I never want to do

 

I want to love unconditionally and build up my fellow man

No one should feel as I did, like a fuck up, feeling damned

 

When I see the slits on some ones wrist, I will not smack them like you did me

I will do the opposite, tell them they are not worthless! And they can be free!

 

Thank you for showing me the wrong way to live…

I am now happy and free from the persecution I felt as a kid

 

And now I just want to spread love and light into the world

All thanks to the perspective you gave to one sad little girl

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