FUUUUUUUUUUCK…FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK. 

That’s what my mind is screaming right now.

Fuck.

Why the hell is my mind spinning so fast? 

Fuck.

Maybe I forgot to take my meds.

Maybe something is wrong in my heart.

Maybe I just need to get high.

No.

I don’t smoke.

I don’t cuss.

That’s not me.

That’s not how people see me.

Chin up, head held high, mouth closed, fingers still.

Stop typing. 

All it does is cause problems.

No…type it out.

Fuck.

Why won’t my heart stop pounding?

I don’t understand.

Just put something else on my plate.

Please I sincerely WANT my head to explode.

Please just kill me.

Maybe then I will be at peace.

Who am I staying alive for?

Me? That’s selfish.

Others? What do they expect from me?

Why on earth should I live up to others’ expectations?

Fuck.

I can’t believe I forgot my meds again.

No wonder I feel like shit.

Fuck.

Fuck.

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!

Maybe if I let it out, I will feel better.

Typing isn’t doing much.

I want to scream.

I want this out of me.

GET OUT! GET THE FUCK OUT!

RAGE WARS IN MY STOMACH!

Why the hell do I feel so crappy?

Nothing helps. 

Where are my meds?

Where are they…?

Not in me…

Nope…

Fuck…