The Friend in My Head

Excuse me, 

you look familiar. 

I swear we've met before.

Are you the reflection I see in the mirror,

Or the slam of a broken door?


You seem recognizable to me:

an old childhood friend,

but one who has disappeared like 

the moviegoer, 

gone from the theater

before the film reaches its end.


You are a ghost of myself.

I can see that now.

You echo all my thoughts

and replicate my frown.


Tell me, what was it 

that caused us to drift apart?

Was it the shatter of my naivete, 

or a difference of the heart?

Were you scared when I learned to live with us

not as one,

but as two? 

Were you frightened when I could 

live, breathe, and speak 

freely without you?


My consciousness has been cleaved

into equal parts of two: 

I live but I can also observe

detached from the situation, just like you.


The books I've read 

have taught me how

to exist, but also contemplate  

the now.

You and I are born of the same mind. 

We may severed but we are two of one kind.


My thoughts are euphoria,

a flailing of the limbs-

A tether that keeps me suspended

between reality and the rabbit hole I am in.


I dream of an oasis.

I seek to procure a cure.

My thoughts have become ailments.

I've never hidden from them before.


I craft the world around me, 

sculpt life with my words. 

In my thoughts I find solace. 

In my mind, the most familiar voices I have heard.


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