
Estranged Doubt
How strange.
Viewing things differently;
I never imagined viewing things differently.
"For survival", I solemnly claimed.
But is it true? I doubt it.
How strange.
It's become alot easier;
For only today? Not sure but it's been easier.
"It'll change", I convince me.
If it doesn't will I still be me? I doubt it.
What'll happen. What'll it be.
This irrational fear gradually consumes me.
Sparks flee when I contemplate possibilities.
I should stay where I think I belong.
Not one will I impact, I thought.
Others have thought the same I'm sure.
But I believe, I think, there's a slight chance.
Does that make me an optimist?
It's not strange.
I'm doing it again;
Losing myself, my thoughts are at it again.
"For survival", maybe that's true.
It'll change.
On the days when doubt is estranged.