Dear Love,

What’s been on my mind?

An eternal pain.

A constant pain.


It's a movement of anxiety and worry that slowly quivers through my body.

A mental imprisonment that ego holds me in.

A black hole of my most unwanted thoughts.


And how I try hard to thrive

But I myself, tear myself apart

And eat myself alive.

And my ego looks down at me amused.

Amused at the suffering and misery

And the abuse.


Who can I blame but myself.

Because I am my own enemy.




Any light that I project ,

My dark hole swallows.

Taking almost every part of me away.

Almost making me hollow.


But somehow it doesn’t

Leaving a bit of light that continues to glow

It’s that little bit of light

That allows me to grow.


It’s that little bit of light

That gives hope

It’s that little bit of light

That reminds me that I’m dope.


My mind is my own prison,

Which I’m trying to escape.

I’m a work progress

About to break out this gate.


This is what’s been going through my head, I’m sorry I’ve been so distant.

I hope to hear from you soon,

Monai Payne.


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