Don't Speak


This morning

I saw you

I saw you talking

And laughing

And smiling

With all your friends around you

And I started to cry

Tears dripping down my throat

And into my heart


I cried because I am selfish

I cry because I want to talk with you

I cry because I want to laugh with you

And smile with you

And cry with you


I cry because I am afraid.

I know that the salty tears inside

Will drown me

Because I know that I am too afraid

To talk and smile and to laugh

With you


If you really knew me

Or saw my salty tears

Then you would be afraid too

You would leave me

To wallow in my pain alone


Or would you try to help me?

Maybe once you saw what was behind the plastered smile

You'd want to help

And I think

That's what I am afraid of most

I'm afraid of you finding out

Who I really am

Because if you did

You would only cause me all the more pain

To watch you

Being dragged down by someone like me


And so next time I see you

I'll be sure to stand silently

That fake smile plastered on my face

In tragic silence

Hoping I truly can

Swallow my words,

Banish them inside

Just so that I don't speak


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