Dear Morgan

Remember the days when we made each other pinky promise

That we would be best friends forever

Remember when we swore never tell our parents

About the movies we saw on tv

Remember when I got sick and you walked me home

And I threw up in the middle of the road

Because earlier we’d had a competition

To see who could eat the most

I still think I won

Remember the times before you started starving yourself?

When I moved away we promised each other

We’d talk twice a week

Dear morgan

What the hell are you doing on a milk box

It says

That you’re missing

Where the hell

Did you go?

Dear morgan

I remember how hard it was

And I don’t remember if your mom shot herself

Or if she used a rope

But I do remember that she used her body for you

Because it was all she had left

And I remember how much you hated your dad’s girlfriend

And I remember that when they got married she wore a green dress and it was ugly

And I remember how we were never allowed to go into his study

But not because he was doing work.

Dear morgan

I remember all the games we played with those dolls while you taught me about

The birds and the bees

And I never asked if you were sad

I remember you showed me what you called music videos

Even as a kid I knew that’s not what they were

Because it made my stomach feel weird

Deep down inside

Like when you are on the down part of a rollercoaster

Dear morgan

Where the hell

Did you go?

Dear morgan

Do you ever think about me?

The girl from north 6^th street

Down the road

A little farther than your parents

Felt comfortable with you walking

But you came anyways

Dear morgan

when you decided to leave

Who did you wish you could take with you

Dear morgan

Where the hell did you go

Or did somebody else take you away

Dear morgan

Do you remember me

Dear morgan

What if found you

What if I took you away

From the places that make you feel lonesome

Dear morgan

I don’t hate you for what you did to me

We were both kids

Dear morgan

don’t blame yourself

Dear morgan

When we joked about running away

I never thought you’d actually do it

Dear morgan

I don’t remember everything

But I remember you laughing at me when I tried to “sexy” dance

Dear morgan

Is your hammock still up in the backyard

Even though you’re not there

To lay on it anymore

Dear morgan

Were you trying to find your mother

Dear morgan

When you were a child

Did you want to grow up to be missing

Dear morgan I don’t remember your house phone number

But I could draw an exact replica of you room

And I don’t know if I’d recognize you anymore

But I’ve studied the missing persons picture long enough to feel something

Dear morgan don’t ever stop sleeping with stuffed animals

Dear morgan I miss you

Dear morgan I hadn’t thought about us for so long

And I wish it hadn’t taken you running away to remember

Dear morgan I’m sorry

You deserve better

Dear morgan

You don’t have to go back to that place that you hated

But remember

That you can never

Run away

from yourself