When it comes to writing,
I never know where to start,
But I know it must have an end.
The day you left was brightly covered,
Like the world did not care you were leaving a little boy behind.
With that wide smile and careless laugh, you left a family behind.
A year pass, you didn’t see me grow,
And I lost myself a little more.
Oblivious to what was going on,
How did you think I was going to turn out?
Growing taller without a father,
Not knowing how to talk,
Not knowing how to feel,
And I shared your wide smile and careless laugh.
That is the armor you left me,
And it protected me from nothing.
How could you do it?
Acting as if the world was going to end,
Feeling jealous of all the other boys
Who grew tall with their fathers.
Those fathers taught them how to shave,
Taught them how to drive,
Taught them how to talk to a girl.
Why was I left alone?
And when my life was turning bright,
You come again to slain.
Scared and confused,
I see you confined within four walls.
We were both not ready
When we talked.
And I still feel alone and unwanted.
But I know where I stand.
Seventeen and the world is my own.
And I know what makes me happy,
And it’s not a wide smile or a careless laugh.
Only me, the one you did not see.
And that is all I need.