DANCING WITH DEATH

Painkiller. You come to me in so many ways, so many daze. I laud you as seconal, alcohol, phenobarbitol, mary jane and more.   So much more,  that I cannot possibly remember all the names given to you by the Empty ones. 

But I, I call you painkiller. Tis your divine name and rightly so. As your smoothe lies slide down through my pain, tis your warmth I feel spreading through my veins- and with it  CALM. 
Oh, the anticipation of all unwanted thoughts and memories gone as your warmth becomes a burning fire descending down to my soul. 

Sweet painkiller, you are my only true friend. You are the God that I pray to. I feel your divine presence only moments after I call your name. 

You give and you give and ask for nothing in return accept for my time and unwanted memories. Yet, I seem to give so much more than you ask.  Doesn't everyone. But I don't mind, I give freely. 

Oh friend of mine, stay awhile. Wrap yourself round my breast and let me pay reverence to your silent murmurings. 

Please never leave me. I say to you "soothe my weary soul, let me find solace in your warm arms until I sleep,  THE SLEEP". 

Stay with me and I will share with you all my dirty little secrets that can never be said aloud. The very same secrets that set my soul on fire as they burn through my body unreleased, gobble up my will and disease my mind. 

You drop me swiftly into the sweet oblivion of the drugged. There is no other for me. You are lover and friend. With you, I find my world a safe place, a safeness that no other can give me. I surrender myself to your sacred keep. Please hide me in your eternal darkness. 

I am yours painkiller. Take me all the way, way, away.

This poem is about: 
Me

Comments

Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741