By: Deniqua Washington
Like a glimmer of light flashing off the tips of my skin.
The sun peering at me, through clouds,
Unfortunately I don’t know where it ends.
If I did, I’d go there, hide in the shadows where it couldn’t reach me.
A shunned, unfortunate soul, damned to the outside gates of bliss for eternity.
I can hear my name being called from somewhere up high.
I want to hide, but it’s like trying to keep a secret from the sky.
You’re probably giving her a piece of me, shining her jeweled crown.
I thought you were my treasure, something lost, that I found.
My hearts fingers continuously wrench at the neck of my brain.
Strangling every type of sense that I’d obtained.
The night before, I’d seen her; I was out of a hawks view.
I remained rigid, attempting to forget that you were there too.
Your arms wrapped around her waist, just like they had mine.
Whispering into her nervous ears that everything would be fine.
Drawing me into your consummation, like the wind of a storm swallowing its prey.
Something told me that I shouldn’t have stayed.
But I ignored it, hoping that you would stop and push her away.
I’m stuck standing here cradling myself, crying.
Hoping that this is some horrible dream that I’m torturing myself with.
Like Medea trying to please Jason, a tragic myth.
See Jason left Medea for another woman.
Just like you chose to do.
Difference is, she avenged the man that betrayed her love.
Who broke the wings of her once stunning dove.
I, on the other hand, have yet to figure out how to stop loving you.
Confused and wrapped up and still torn in two.
One side of me wanting to wrestle you like I would a panther searching for fresh meat.
The other groveling, begging for you to see me, and kissing your feet.
I loved you prior to you turning into a golden sparkle of an Adonis.
You’d become more than a simple fling.
More than a slight chilling breeze on a summer day, caressing my legs, and stinging my knees.
Slowly you slipped your undeniable charm down my throat.
It pleased me, and I consumed it, until I began to choke.
Finally realizing that this was just my superfluous imagination making you out to be more than you actually are.
I told myself what to do.
My conscience reiterated
My esophagus coughed the words
My tongue tasted them
But my lips couldn’t muster up the strength to even whisper it.
Now my soul is shouting for me to release what has been agitating the very core of it.
My spirit, the eye of a hurricane ready to destroy whatever is in its path.
A natural disaster ruled to be deadlier than the girls that came before me.
See I never showed you how to treat me.
Never taught you how to prepare for when I came through shattering your windows.
A category five, ensuing spitefully.
With angst in my heart, a smile on my face, and a mind set on destroying indefinitely.
I must let go.
Before you and I are foes.
Just a insurmountable queen with some scars.
But now, at my golden gates.....there’s a guard.