Beautiful Word for an Ugly World

When we're sixteen and breathing is like shoving steel through our veins,

it's hard and it hurts but we keep doing it.

When we're nineteen and we've been cut loose,

and all we know is we don't want to make it to forty,

because we'd rather be in this self-made ditch

than some capitalistic slump in a job

we did too well and didn't want enough.

 

Words like teen idol, words like suicidal,

they're the scariest ones yet.

Sixteen years and I know I say them all the time,

bloody truth hidden in the joke,

but it's a heavy, heavy word for the lighthearted loves.

It’s a beautiful word for an ugly world.

You can say it to my face and you can whisper it to the dark of your room

and I'll pray it to all the gods that I don't trust in.

But if you scream it too quietly, too jokingly,

how am I to trust you're not as just fucked as I am.

 

Lighthearted loves with pretty mouths and easy hands,

you're too good for these words, too bright for this world,

but I can't believe with a word like that you aren't just like me on the inside.

When we're sixteen

and breathing is like shoving steel through our veins,

it's hard and it hurts but we keep doing it.

When we're nineteen and we've been cut loose,

and all we know is we don't want to make it to forty,

because we'd rather be in this self-made ditch

than some capitalistic slump in a job

we did too well and didn't want enough.

Words like drop out, words like failure,

they’re the scariest ones yet.

Nineteen years and I know I say them all the time,

bloody truth hidden in the fake,

but it’s a heavy, heavy life for the lighthearted loves.

It’s a beautiful word for an ugly world.

You can say it to my face and you can whisper it

to the dark of your room

and I’ll pray to all the gods that I don’t trust in.

But if you scream it too quietly, too jokingly,

how am I to trust you’re not as fucked as I am on the inside.

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