The In Between
The world is loud.
And busy.
Everyone pushing to get to the same places
They rush by and life passes them by like the blur of faces
The only difference between you and me is I get stuck
In the in between.
Trying to count my steps and hold my tongue I trip over my sentences.
Words are defenses but I feel defenseless
When I say what I mean but don't mean what I say I downplay what I mean and get stuck
In the in between
Your mind is a soldier fighting an endless war but sometimes you don't know what side it's fighting for
It sends you warnings to keep you alive but what happens when in order to survive you need to hurt the people you trust?
You begin to doubt whether each compliment you receive is true
You follow your heart and your heart is a drum marching in time.
Now you're a soldier on the front line fighting against the noises inside
Your head.
You begin to apologize for things you can't control because you want to hold on to the relationships you built but at the same time you think the're crashing down
Around you.
Just calm down
Pump your veins full of drugs until you silence the voices that are screaming inside your head
Calm down.
It's the same as someone telling you to breathe when your head's underwater or to catch your breath but they make you run faster
The world is loud and busy
I run in circles to make people smile till I'm dizzy.
Because my mind is wired to second guess every passing remark while I sit alone in the dark and get lost
In the in between.