When I was in the first grade,

 

I learned how to spell

 

I got 2nd place in the class spelling bee

 

Everyone thought I did really well

 

 

When I was in the 2nd grade,

 

I was the spelling bee queen

 

I could challenge anyone

 

I could outspell teens

 

 

When I was in the 3rd grade,

 

I wanted to be a writer

 

I used to write stories

 

That made days brighter

 

 

 

I don't remember the grade,

 

But some teen poets came to my school

 

They were rhyming and we were snapping

 

The whole experience was cool

 

 

 

Somewhere down the road

 

My crush said my writing sucks

 

Everyone else thought so too

 

And there goes my luck

 

 

So my mom got me a diary

 

And they were all filled with him

 

My writing got weirder

 

It was actually kind of grim

 

 

 

Years have gone by

 

And I write for therapeutic reasons

 

It makes me feel bright 

 

Like the summer season

 

 

I still write about that crush

 

Who didn't believe in me

 

I write about other things too

 

Like my disability

 

 

That I found out I had in September of last year

 

It makes me not care about the things I loved 

 

Like reading and cheer

 

 

 

Leading is something I am not good at 

 

But writing is something fun 

 

I don't feel like such a door mat

 

 

 

Have you had that feeling that you were just like everyone else

 

Then everyone tells you to just be yourself

 

But who is that?

 

I don't know?

 

I will just act like I know the solution

 

When I write this poem maybe it will decrease all of the confusion