We fell in love in late spring 

As cool wind nipped at our cheeks 

we found warmth in each others bodies 

Our love blossomed into the summer

Hot, sunny days 

Walking trails hand in hand 

Spraying each other with the garden hose

as we fell deeper into autumn and the leaves crackled under our feet

And we were again welcomed

Into the arms of a gentle breeze 

But when the snow began to fall

Something in your eyes changed 

And this home we built, no longer felt like home at all

Every nook and crevice etched in the mundane memories of our lament love story

The seasons they came and went

Years bleeding into each other

Until the day I found myself screaming for my mother into my pillow

Choking and gasping on the words I could never swallow 

You spit venom all over my name, meanwhile I immortalized you so much people actually began to believe me

I think even more so than I ever believed myself

I tried, I really did

I wrote you silly little love poems; spilling my heart out onto the pages, only to realize you never even liked poetry at all

Did you even read them?

To be loved by you.. well the truth is that was the only thing I ever aspired. 

My dreams dissipated, as all I wanted was to be the girl you loved so deeply it made your bones ache. 

But now only my bones ache. From carrying the weight of your expectations. 

You were the beauty in the world that I wished to paint all over my body. Permanent markings to look back on when I am old and withered, and there is nothing else left of me. You were the mountains on my collarbone, the rose on my ankle. Memories made and forever etched in the black ink on my skin. 

But for you, I was just a bookmark placed in this chapter of your life. Always disposable. My name lost its significance the very moment the chapter ended. 

You left me here alone

So now I sit here, and I rot with the flowers in our garden